Sanctuary for My Mind

These past snowstorm days have allowed for some cozy, couch reading with the kids. "The Hunchback of Notre Dame" was chosen, and I was intrigued, since I had never read the "real" story before. It was a little dreary and a bit gory, but the childrens' version made it acceptable. My little princess walked around with the book for two days, seizing every opportunity to hold it out to me for more. Any spare moment she caught me having, we were in Paris, hugging Gargoyles and dodging a public hanging.

I found the story very interesting, not just because of the typical "love people even if they aren't beautiful" theme, but with the idea of obsession. It seemed that every major character in the book was obsessed with someone. Dom Claude with Esmerelda...Esmerelda with Phoebus...Phoebus with himself...the old recluse woman with her lost daughter. Every obsessed person ended up either crazy or dead, or both. Quasimodo was the only one who loved sacrificially, but ended up dying of a broken heart anyway. What a depressing ending!! I thought the kids would hate the ending, but they actually liked it. They liked a tragedy. I put my feelings aside and appreciated the lesson. They want to watch the movie now. Not the Disney version, but a "real people" version. We'll see. I depends on how disgusting Quasimodo's weeping eye is.

I have a mind that can obsess. A mind that sometimes fixates on one thing or person and won't seem to let go of the thought, speeding it forward, growing it into something very intense and controlling, but not real...nor healthy. As a kid, I just went with it, not realizing how it would effect my thinking later. As I grew up, the thinking pattern often interfered with healthy relationships and peaceful daily functioning. I wasn't until I discovered the importance of 2 Corinthians 10:5 that I got control of my thoughts before they got control of me.

"We are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ"

Unlike the characters of Victor Hugo's book, I was able to "get real" and live life free from the cell my imagination tried to lock me in. Accepting reality (and loving it) rather than insisting on fantasy is very freeing. Movies, department stores and high technology continue to lure people into the prison of obsession, but trying to have the mind of Christ, taking thoughts captive and refusing to let them dictate how you feel and what you pursue allows you to live in wide open spaces. He makes me lie down in green pastures and restores my soul. All of God's ways are freeing, once they are embraced. Letting go is the hard part.

Once in awhile I randomly ask my husband what he is thinking. Expecting some dreamy thought, he is usually doing some mathematical calculation, figuring out how Barry Sanders makes those amazing touch downs or nothing. I don't know how thinking about nothing is possible, but wow...that would be nice sometimes. That is another reason why I love him so much. He helps ground me. When my thoughts are getting away with me and I'm too weak to grab a hold of them, I grab a hold of him. His mental stability is extremely attractive and peaceful. A benefit I embrace of the two becoming one in marriage. Don't tell him this, but he is like my Quasimodo, carrying my mind to sanctuary. Only WAY better looking :)